Lots of news around the dog house today. First, Kevin Roderick of LAObserved.com, known in LA internet circles as the Westside White Guy, reported that Austin Beutner, the mayor’s new jobs czar, has contributed $5,000 to Republican Meg Whitman’s campaign for governor.
Then, about 10 minutes ago, Bruno was slipped a transcript of a phone
call this morning from Jerry Brown to Antonio. I can’t reveal my
source, but the pup was recently photographed monkeying around in the
mayor’s backyard. (We dogs stick together.)
Jerry: Antonio, hi. It’s Jerry. How you doing?
Antonio: Jesus, what time is it? Jerry who?
Jerry: Jerry Brown, for chrissakes, the guy you didn’t want to run against for governor. It’s 10 o’clock, Antonio, wake up.
I guess I shouldn’t have had ordered that last $800 bottle of wine last
night at Bouchon. But Keith and Ari insisted, and, hey, they were
buying. Those guys love me.
Jerry: I hate those fancy
places. I read in Willie Brown’s column you had an expensive dinner
with him and Fabian at some place called Cut. Jeez, Antonio, the guy
hasn’t has a hit in years.
Antonio: That’s Fabian Nunez, Jerry. He was once Assembly Speaker, like Willie and me.
Jerry: You were Speaker?
Antonio: What do you want, Jerry. I need to walk Monkey and get to City Hall.
Jerry: You have a monkey?
No. Monkey’s my girlfriend’s dog. If I don’t walk it, the beast dumps
all over the living room floor of my mansion. The servants hate that.
Jerry: I live in a converted firehouse. It still has the pole. Anne loves it.
Antonio: I’m sure. Now what are you calling about?
Jerry: This guy Beutner.
Jerry: Austin Beutner. Your new jobs czar.
Oh, yeah. Now I remember. Riordan and Broad came up with him. Big
time financial guy until he fell off his bike or something. I got him
for a dollar a year. What’s the problem?
Jerry: He gave five thousand dollars to Meg.
Jerry: Meg Whitman, my likely Republican opponent. Ran EBay.
Antonio: She was on Bay Watch?
Jerry: No, Antonio, EBay, the internet company where people buy and sell stuff.
Antonio: Never heard of it. Sounds like City Hall to me.
Jerry: Never mind. What the hell is he doing contributing to my Republican opponent?
I don’t know. Maybe Riordan told him to do it. He rides bicycles, too
(Dog barks in background) Would somebody shut the f…ing dog up!! I’m
on the phone with the next governor of California.
Jerry: Oh, yeah. Thanks a lot for not running. Saves me a lot of aggravation.
Like I had a choice after the damn girlfriend thing. I don’t
understand why those reporters didn’t believe I stopped wearing my
wedding ring because I lost weight.
Jerry: The press sucks.
Antonio: Tell me about it.
Jerry: Well, I gotta go. Do me a favor and talk to Beutner. He’s on your payroll.
Antonio: OK. I’m sure somebody around here has his number. Take it easy. And if you change your mind about running ……
Jerry: I won’t. Bye.
Bruno says woof! woof!